KOKO'S DIARY: "LITTLE TIME YOU SEE ME LITTLE TIME YOU DONT"

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Today like always I remembered my mum’s saying how she would scream and make funny faces and say to me in the most colourful language she can imagine…. Koko little time you see me little time you don’t. sighs. This story is not a pleasant one, its not about the hair salon or the party I crashed and definitely not about the twitter love experience my darlings, its about life!!! Some of you might not be in a position to connect with me as I write this but im sure for those who do it will melt the ice and make you understand that what you are going through that some people out there feel it too.

31st May 2013, this day started like any normal day, I woke up and quickly checked the blog to see if new people had commented and my views had increased, then went to make myself a cup of tea. While I stayed there wondering aloud why PHCN was a failed venture in my country, they decided to surprise me with half current… moi moi is better than akara I thought as I made straight to put on the TV. I was there enjoying my morning while chilling for my dad to come out of his room to decide whether or not I was going to have a lazy morning or jump into the kitchen. Hours passed and he still didn’t come out, hmmm the sleep must have made mad sense. Just as I heard the sound of his door, PHCN took the light and one line of joy in me just cut. The lazy Anthem just stopped singing and I was bracing up to start my daily chores when my dad said from a sharp glance into the parlour, ‘prepare koko we are going to see our sick neighbor in the hospital tomorrow morning by 10am.’ As he turned to make way back into his room I asked amidst my shock, why not today? Tomorrow is quite far to wait when someone is sick. He looked at me for a while in such a way to be like that’s true let me reason with her..then he answered “ok get ready!”


After like 30minutes I was set to go to the hospital, its not like I needed any form of dressing or special appearance look so I had no makeup whatsoever on, and a casual jeans and top. The drive to the hospital was a long one I never wanted to end cause I hated hospitals and the aura around them. We finally came to a halt at the hospital and I picked my phone, dialed my neighour’s number and she came down to pick us at the car park. I watched her closely as she managed to squeeze a smile at the sight of us, she had grown so lean from the last 3 days I saw her and she had a mixed face of worried, sad and confused all in one. I felt tiny chills of fear down my spine as we walked the straight road to the men’s ward.’ So how is he? My dad managed to break the silence. She looked up at him and said hmmm I just don’t know sir! We are counting on God. She had struggled with those words you could tell even from a distance because I saw her break down the heap of faith she might have built up so high in those few seconds till we got to the ward. Hospitals I just don’t like them one bit…the looks on so many helpless peoples faces just drives a sharp knot into your brain that damn that could be you or anyone you love. We walked straight to my neighbour’s side of the ward. I saw him lying helpless on the bed and I just dropped a tear. Stop it koko I said to myself immediately.. where is the support you brought for this people? I watched his wife hold on to his hands so tightly like it was their first time together and I looked down to see his son, confused but still manly. While we were there trying to make them feel loved and supported, something happened. He had stopped breathing, no pulse, no reaction, my God. “call the doctor, please call the doctor we kept screaming in turns. My neighbour’s daughter couldn’t take it no more as she stood up and made a run for it.That race from the ward to the dr’s quarters was not a close one but I saw my neighbor run as fast as her legs could carry her, it was a race for her father’s life.i looked up quickly to take a glance at my dad’s face, and just inside me I said I quick prayer of thanksgiving for where we were at that moment and how we have been coping after my mother’s death and I prayed again for my friends and their father and hoped truly for the God’s intervention in this present case. 20 minutes had passed now and the doctor was nowhere to be found. Nigerian factor(inefficiency), the nurses were just roaming around like tears did nothing to them. At this point his wife was already drowning in her tears. Another drop fell off my eyes and again I pushed myself to be more supportive. I walked towards her and held her hands. No doctor yet? What is happening? Then one nurse walked down and raised his hand in a way to check for pulse. She checked and said nothing to the family who all looked in her direction as she walked away with no care at all. Then after like 2 ceilings away she turned and said “lets wait for the doctor”. My dad was getting really uncomfortable there now as he walked out of the ward and I followed him. If checking pulse was one way to revive someone that was dying, then my neighbor would have lived even longer than expected cause his daughter kept checking and checking. 2 people had gone in search of a doctor just one doctor and still even his shadow was nowhere close. I heard a scream from the ward and rushed in to see my neighour’s wife crying again, I had to take her out of the ward and make some pep talk of what I knew absolutely nothing about.

Oh finally the doctor was here. Gloves!! She screamed she was a very young woman probably in her twenties. She looked good in her robe and but was surprisingly sluggish to what was at hand. “please everyone leave the room she said as she turned to the nurse. Put on the oxygen” that moment it felt like Christ had come again and the sinners were free from their sins like a solution had come and I was beginning to get a little relieve. I looked at my neighbor and I wondered what was going through her mind, I thought again about the many memories I had made of their dad. 10 years of sharing the same neighbourhood, I had so much thoughts to choose from. I heard the dr do CPR so hard I thought she was going to break him. And when she came out and asked please who will stand in for the family, every hope I built right there and then broke down. He died. The sleepless nights in the hospital,the struggles, the pains, the memories, the joys and laughters over the years, the prayers yes prayers cause I trust my neighbours to always turn to God in their most trying times, the feelings inside. I was helpless to them and it didn’t feel good at all.

The drive home was as quiet as the mortuary my neighbor was now transferred to. I imagined if we had waited till 10am Saturday morning if we would have met my neighbour alive, I thought about my first day in that hospital with my little cousin Edozie, and how he had died there, I thought about my mum whose body was also deposited in that hospital’s mortuary, I also thought about my friends and the home and the new life they were about to start living. The tears began to come down again, and this time I let it. I looked up to God in heaven and just said “even in this time I thank you”

Life is shorter than you think, you don’t know this? Well think again!!!

Just incase you were thinking of questioning God, I have every reason to trust him, cause he is GOD he will never put you in a situation he knows you cant handle. Be strong.

Signed KOKO